What to Do and How to Help When a Neighbor’s Spouse Passes Away
Navigating the loss of an acquaintance like a neighbor is tough. Regardless of whether you spoke frequently or would merely wave in passing, reaching out to the widowed spouse during a time like this is vitally important to show you care. However, you may find yourself asking questions like “what should I do?” And “how do I help?”
As friendly neighbors who recently found ourselves asking these very same questions when a neighbor of ours lost her husband, we have compiled a list of ideas and tips on what to do and how to help when you are faced with the sad loss of a neighbor.
Ideas for Immediately Following the News of a Neighbor Who Has Passed
Hand Deliver A Sympathy Card
Write out a sympathy card with your condolences and make sure to include your contact information (if they don’t already have it). Also, do not stay unless invited, and don’t overstay your welcome if you are.
2. Give A Plant
Flower arrangements are great and are beautiful sentiments, but house plants or potted plants that will last are much nicer!
3. Send Food
A food dish like a casserole, think lasagna or some baked penne, or a side-dish or appetizer would be great for your neighbor and for feeding visitors. Most important though, make it something that can easily be warmed up or frozen for later.
4. Snack Platters or Displays
Snack platters or displays like fruit, cheese and crackers, veggies, lunch meat and roles, etc. Make things easy for the widow and their family to grab-and-go or simply just nibble. Fruit displays like those from Edible Arrangements, not only make for a quick and easy and tasty snack, but also a beautiful table piece.
5. Send Sweets
Cookies, cakes, sweet breads, muffins, bundt cakes or any kind of simple desserts are very comforting. Try mini bundt cakes from places like Nothing Bundt Cakes or any packaged desserts from your local grocery store bakery is just as sweet!
6. Provide Drinks
If you don’t cook or bake, that’s not a problem! With all the visitors your neighbor is likely to have, cases of water, soda or any kind of bottled or canned beverages are always appreciate. And while drinks like these that they can save for later are great, you can also send coffee or tea in travel cases like those sold at Starbucks.
7. Seed Packets or Favors
When an unexpected death occurs, it’s hard to think of everything (or anything at all sometimes). Providing your neighbor with personalized seed packets or some type of favors or mementos for them to cherish and pass out to their visitors is extremely thoughtful. You can find our assortment of personalized seed packets and other favors and gift in our shop here at Gloria’s Garden.
8. Make Cleanup Easier
One of the least thought of, but definitely most important ideas are paper and plastic goods, like paper plates, plastic cups, napkins and utensils. These items are great and create one less worry for your neighbor when it comes to washing dishes and keeping things tidy during this time.
9. Gift Baskets and Treats
Gift baskets of nuts, snacks, teas, etc are great to share or save for later, like those from Harry & David or GourmetGiftBaskets.com. Boxed chocolates or a bottle of wine are simple and sweet gifts too.
10. Include a Gift Card for Food
Gift cards for food, especially food delivery services, are the perfect lasting gift for when visitors slow or cease, but cooking still isn’t a priority. Slip it in your sympathy card or attach it with any other gift to make things extra special!
While passing along your condolences and care immediately following the news of your neighbor’s passing is imperative, checking in on their husband or wife and keeping up with them in the weeks and months following, after their visitors have ceased, is JUST as important. Your proximity plays a huge role! The following are some ideas to continue helping your widowed neighbor and friend well beyond the convoy of visitors.
Ideas for the Weeks & Months Following a Neighbor’s Passing
Help With the Trash
Take in and out the garbage cans. This simple chore can be a huge help and a tiny little weight off your shoulders.
Take the Mail In
Take in the mail or any packages or the newspaper. While an easy task, sometimes it’s the easy things that count.
Household Maintenance
Help with any household maintenance like mowing the lawn, raking leaves, clearing the rain gutters, weeding, or helping inside the house, like washing dishes, sweeping, mopping and wiping down the bathrooms. Offer to provide contact information for utility companies or help to sort out the bills. If these were things their spouse usually took care of, this can be a huge help!
Keep Sending Food
Send food that can easily be warmed up or frozen for later. Cooking for one is often hard, so easy to freeze and warm meals are perfect! If their spouse was the primary cook, consider packaging in individual containers, labeled with preparation instructions to make things even easier!
Invite Them Out
Invite them over or out for lunch or dinner, or even just for coffee or tea. Sometimes it just helps to get out!
Pick Up Groceries or Medications
Offer to pick up groceries or other necessities like medications. While getting out is great, sometimes helping with just the mundane tasks, like shopping, can be a huge help.
Offer to Babysit
Offer to babysit or take the kids out for a while. If your neighbor has young kids, the continued stress of this type of situation can often be hard. Giving your neighbor time for themselves and taking the kids out for the day to be, well, kids, is a great offering!
Offer to Pet Sit
Offer to watch their pets or take their pets for walks. Our furry friends need love too, so lending a helping hand with pets is always a great gesture!
Send Gifts
Gifts like mementos, flowers, books, etc, show your continued care and can be given any time.
Don’t Forget Special Holidays
Don’t forget special days like birthdays or holidays. Take them a special gift, invite them over or take them out. Sometimes all they really need is some company!
If you have lost a loved one and a neighbor did something for you that was extra special, or you did something for a neighbor you thought was great, please share it with us! We’d love to hear some neighborly love! Wishing you, AND your neighbors, nothing but the best!I
